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Wednesday, July 27, 2011

The One Where Laney Goes 'Round The Bend


Dear Laney,

You'll never guess where we went after school yesterday. I picked you up a little early, because I thought it would be a great, fun surprise to drive into town and ride the carousel.


It was the greatest feeling in the world when you realized where we were, shouted 'ORSE! and took off running. We rode the carousel four times in a row, but then I decided we needed to get home, and instead of carrying you back into the line, I carried you out to the parking lot. That's when things turned ugly.

I've never wrestled an alligator, but I imagine the experience of getting you into your car seat when you by-God don't want to leave the carousel is similar. I don't want to merely suggest that you turned crazy. I want to come right out and confirm that you went abso-dang-lutey nuts. Faye Dunaway in "Mommie Dearest" nuts. Sally Field in "Sybil" nuts. Old Yeller when he had rabies and was foaming at the mouth nuts.

You screamed at me all the way to the interstate. I stopped at the drive-through coffee place on the way out of town to get a smoothie and a muffin, thinking that a snack might calm everyone down. But you took that smoothie from me just long enough to look me in the eye and then spike it on the floor of the car.

I called Peg Peg on the way home for moral support, but above all your screaming from the backseat, all I could hear her say was "Wooo-WEEEEE!"

I think it's going to be a while before we go back to ride the horse. The buzz is great, but the hangover's a killer.

Love,
Mom


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